Archive for October 2nd, 2007


Klaatu “3:47 EST”

Listening to The Knack made me think about Klaatu, even though I can’t find my Klaatu album, which is probably just as well, it would probably not pass the nostalgia/nausea quotient. But it always makes me happy to think about Klaatu, who REALLY WERE supposed to be The Beatles in secret identity. I don’t know if the band started that rumor– I suspect they didn’t– but I’m sure it didn’t hurt record sales.

Looking them up on the big internet, I find that THEY have a website, have released 10 records over the years, and one of them recently died. I think it might not be such a good idea for me to be looking up these bands on the internet. There is not likely going to be anything that doesn’t depress me one way or another.

One of the reasons, I guess, that the Beatles rumor started was that they didn’t list their names on the record or have a picture of the band. There is a picture of them, however, on Wikipedia: there are three guys, and it looks like: porn star John Holmes, Don Van Vliet, and either Ben or Jerry from Ben and Jerry’s ice cream. Now THAT’S a supergroup!


The Knack “Get The Knack”

You get the feeling it’s all fake, played by studio musicians, a guy from Mott the Hoople, and the guy who wrote The Archies’ songs,  or maybe they’re actually Cheap Trick, or, I don’t know, a band created by that supercomputer that takes up a whole room. I just looked up their website, and they’re still together! Except for the drummer, who died. The first thing under “news” says “Doug’s cancer is in remission.” Too much fucking perspective, to quote This Is Spinal Tap, sorry!

The album cover and pics announce that THIS IS the NEW Beatles. No. I guess they would be totally forgotten if it wasn’t for “My Sharona” which isn’t even a good song. “Your Number or Your Name” is a nice pop song, and “Maybe Tonight” is a nice ballad, but that’s about it. Everything is black and white, vests and skinny ties, and in the cover band portrait Doug Fieger’s head is at least twice as big as any of the other guys’ heads, who all have help from totally styled, puffy hairdos.

The most impressive thing is the inner sleeve, all black except for a little photo of a The Knack pin. And the fan club info: Leslye & Nicole PO Box 46926 Los Angeles CA 90046. I would bet there was NO fan club, and that PO box was where some studio engineer received his pornography. But I bet whoever has that box now occasionally gets some pretty funny, way after the fact fan mail!

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October 2007